An Update

Ah yes, finally an update. Your lives have meaning all over again.

Let’s see what has transpired in the interim.

The Men in Blue fail miserably.
Britney Spears divorces Kevin Federline.
Salman Khan is suspected for having links with the underworld

Yes, as you can see it’s been a season of surprises.
Good, so now that we’ve reviewed the world news and covered all the important topics like global warming (the real reason why Britney didn’t wear underwear), genocide in Sudan (Madonna adopting an African kid) and George Bush’s assassination (I wish) we will move on to the personal front.

I lost my phone…. again. Rather, someone saw it and decided that they wanted it… again!
The fourth time, this is happening to me. Anyone who has lost their phone, even if its only just once, will know the supreme pain it is. And I mean this in a fishing for ‘new’ one rupee coins at the PCO and scavenging around for lost contacts kind of way. Like my friend KC quite accurately put it: Losing a cell phone is like losing a limb. I felt worse then than after any of my break-ups.

I still remember the first time it happened. It was a dark and stormy night…. My beloved Samsung C 100 was a mere 42 days old, still in cell phone infancy when someone laid their greedy paws on it. Oh the trauma! I went through all the 5 stages of grief, dealing with the loss.

Denial: No, it cannot be. I could not have lost my phone. It just cannot be.

Anger: WTF! The thieving muddher f*%^#&s!!!!!

Bargaining: Okay, if I find my phone I promise that I’ll never give fake accounts to my parents again. God promise.

Depression: Do I really need to explain this. I mean come on, I lost my baby.

Acceptance: So long my sweet. You were my first and will always hold a special place in my heart.

Getting to the final stage was a long winded journey. Being my first phone, I simply could not comprehend my miserable luck. Why me? Why me? Why me? Why me? Why me? I related my tale of woe in the weeks that followed to everyone and more. Initially I believed that I was the only recipient of such an injustice. Yet every time I narrated my tale of incredible misfortune the listener had a similar story to tell. Left it in the auto… Kept it on the table…. Went for a concert…- different beginnings with the same result. This got me thinking… has no one managed to escape the Fate of the Fidgety Fingers? And then I remembered a story my granny told me when still under five feet and wore those hideous contraptions called Bermudas.

One day when Buddha was meditating under the Bodhi tree a villager approached him. He was young and well built, but his gait was haggard and his clothes were disheveled. Seeing the man’s tear-stained face Buddha’s heart went out to him. “What is it young man, that causes you so much grief?” he enquired. “O’ enlightened one”, the man sobbed, “My Beloved Wife died last night.” His face was downcast with grief. “You are all-knowing, O’ wise one. Why must I alone be subject to such misery? Please bring her back to life.”
Buddha knew that this was not one of the trifle questions he usually encountered like, “Why does my neighbor have 15 cows when I have one?” So he thought carefully before answering. “I will grant your wish and bring your wife back to life”, Buddha said, “but on one condition.” The villager instantly perked up and nodded his head in consent. He was prepared to do anything to bring his Beloved Wife back to life. “I want you to bring me a handful of mustard from a house that has not had a death. If you can perform this act I will bring your Beloved Wife back to life.”
While the young man was puzzled by this unusual request, he wasn’t going to argue with one who had attained salvation. Besides, it seemed like a simple enough task. The man set out immediately. All day he went from house to house, asking for a handful of mustard. While everyone was more than willing to oblige him, he soon found that he could not accept it from any; because there wasn’t a single family who had not experienced the death of a loved one.
It was dusk, and the bereaved husband was still empty handed. But though he was unsuccessful in his quest, he finally understood the point Buddha was trying to make. Death and sorrow are the universal facts of life. No man can evade them.

In case you’re wondering; there is a link. Because such was the lesson Pooja learnt as well. While death and sorrow aren’t exactly an inevitable part of a student’s life and may eventually go the small pox way thanks to cloning and some good ole weed. The loss of a cell phone on the other hand, is the inescapable reality of today.


So while I am beginning to accept these hard Facts of Life, I am very much loving my new Moto C 168 with FM radio and 4096 colors and all for just Rs. 2700!! So here’s wishing it a happy first month anniversary and praying that I will be fifth time lucky. And hopefully its resemblance to a Made in China plastic toy will play an important role in deterring subsequent phone thieves.